Q: Why are you adopting internationally when there are children in the US who need homes?
Short Answer: Because that is what God has called us to do.
Long Answer: When God first laid on our hearts to begin researching adoption, we looked at many possibilities, including foster care and domestic infant adoption. It was our understanding that in the case of domestic infant adoption, the pregnant mother chooses the family who adopts her child through a profile-viewing system. We felt that most of these mothers would be more likely to pick an infertile couple, or a family with only 1 child, rather than us. We understand this completely. In terms of foster care, we did not decide to pursue this because we felt that God was calling us to add an orphaned child to our family permanently. The goal of foster care is reunification with biological family, and we wholeheartedly support this. Foster care is an amazing way to serve the Lord and serve needy children and families in our community and we have great respect for individuals who choose to do this. It is not, however, what God has called us to do at this time.
Q: Why are you adopting a baby when there are so many more older children who need homes?
Short Answer: Because that is what God has called us to do.
Long Answer: There are two main reasons why we feel that adopting an older child would not be in the best interests of our family. First of all, we felt that it would be wise to keep birth order in our family, and not upset Weston's place as our firstborn. Because Weston is only 3, and adopting an infant through our agency means a child between 0 and 2, we could not move up to the next age range, which would be adopting a child between 3 and 5. Second, Pat and I have no experience parenting a child over the age of 3. We know babies and are fully entrenched in that season of life. It is where I feel most comfortable, having done it 3 times now. Yes, there are many children of all ages, all around the world, who are orphaned and in need of loving, Christian homes. Perhaps one day Pat and I will be able to offer a home to one of those children, but that is not what God has called us to at this time.
Q: So what happened with Trevor's birth?
Short Answer: None of your business!
Long Answer: I was quite surprised that THIS was the detail that nearly every woman I know was curious about and latched onto. Truly I am sorry that I ever wrote that in the first post. I have no intention of divulging any details about what I was referring to. But I will say this....Trevor is 100% healthy and I am grateful to the Lord for that. I am not suffering anything life-threatening, and I can, and do, live my life normally. My midwife was fantastic and is in NO WAY at fault for anything that happened. I cherish her as a dear friend and would never do or say anything to malign her character or reputation. I do not regret having a homebirth; on the contrary, I am even more grateful that I did.
Q: Are you guys planning to have any more biological children?
Short Answer: We hope so, but it depends on the Lord's will for us.
Long Answer: The Lord changed our beliefs about family planning several years ago and so we never claim to know what will happen in the future. We do not have a number of kids that we are hoping to "get to" or "stop after." We desire a large family, and have a heart for that. By the world's standards our family is already large, but we hope that it will be much larger. I think that I would be very sad if I were never to be pregnant or give birth again. That being said, we do not know what the future holds and we will be faithful to the Lord, as we always have, to seek Him in prayer and counsel after our adoption is finalized and we have all adjusted to see what He would have us do next.
Q: So you will prevent pregnancy while you are adopting? How will you do that?
Answer: At this time, no, we are not planning a pregnancy, but again, we will continue to seek the Lord in this. We specifically chose an adoption agency and program that would not require us to put our adoption on hold in the event of a pregnancy.
Q: Do you have a name for your adopted daughter?
Answer: Yes, we have a name that we love, but are not quite ready to announce it yet. Pat has trouble committing to names so early :)
Q: Where are you now in the process? How long will it take?
Answer: We have applied and been accepted to a child-placing agency. We have applied to, and are waiting on more details from, an agency that is licensed in MD to do our homestudy. Our next step is to complete our homestudy, which will take 2-3 months. Our best estimate is that the entire process will take 18 months - 2 years.
Q: How much will your adoption cost? How are you going to afford it? How can I help?
Answer: Our best estimate is that our adoption will cost approximately $27,000. We honestly do not know how we will afford it...we trust the Lord will provide and equip us for what He has called us to do. I am currently doing a 31 bags fundraiser on Facebook through a friend who is a consultant. Please let me know if you are interested in ordering and I will give you the link. We are also planning a Pancake Breakfast fundraiser to be held at the New Market Grange on Saturday, June 1. We will begin selling tickets for this event sometime in the next few weeks. We are looking for volunteers to help on this day and to help us sell advanced tickets. Please let me know if you are interested in that. We are possibly going to do a raffle or silent auction on the same day as the breakfast, and will be seeking donated prizes for that. Pat and I are also both looking for part time work opportunities on evening and weekends, and for additional fundraising ideas and opportunities. Please contact us if you have anything to share. We would gratefully accept gifts/donations of any kind or amount.
We hope you had a blessed Easter season!
Well said, Sarah! :)
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